To Tell or Not to Tell?

Sexual attraction to the female form is a very normal part of being a man. A large part of the social life of any male is being able to have banter with other males about our sexual attraction to various females. After sport, sex is probably the most common topic of conversation for any average male. Even very sexually descriptive conversations about what we'd like to do with certain females if given half the chance is not at all a controversial topic of conversation between men. Now we might never say it to women, but the dynamic of sexual conversations between men is quite blunt and straight forward.

This becomes complicated however when our sexual interest is not the norm. Most of my male friends will never know how sexually attracted I am to muscular women. This is because from an emotional and self esteem point of view, I couldn't take the rejection I would feel from the inevitable mockery. Some friends do know, but this was only done after a very careful evaluation of the situation and assessing the likelihood of rejection and ostracisation. Unfortunately on one occasion, I failed to read the situation and a friend proceeded to take the piss out of me for several minutes. It was very humiliating. Eventually he came around and while he still didn't understand it, he became genuinely curious. While I appreciated it at the time, his initial goading did make me feel very insecure in my sexuality. This is a struggle that I imagine a lot of schmoes are familiar with. Society constantly tells women they have to look a certain way, women who choose not to accept such restraints put themselves in an awkward situation, but so too do those of us who raise our head above the parapet and declare our love of female muscles. We suffer the taunts of friends, who while they will not reject us as people, are indirectly telling us 'your sexual preference goes against the typical 'rules' of sexual attraction for males. I will not condemn you as a person, but I cannot condone your unorthodox sexuality. Therefore I will voice my disapproval through the medium of humour.'

Whether or not this is because such men are genuinely disgusted or find themselves confused by the fact they secretly feel the same, is a topic for another day, but is really a moot point. The heart of the matter is that men like us, men like me, do not have our sexual preferences fully accepted. Unfortunately I cannot envisage this changing any time soon. That is why our 'virtual' world becomes so important.